Tuesday, 31 May 2011

A Tour of Art

Disclaimer: The following is my recording of events, and uses my own opinions. I do not consider myself an art expert and by no means am against modern art. I simply am describing the event according to my tastes in art, and do not mean to cause offence. Remember this is my personal blog, not a gallery description.

I have provided links to all of the galleries, so you can forge your own opinion. Please also check out the photographer's photos, and George's blog

A Tour of Art

Last Friday I was roped into an intriguing and somewhat interesting art themed 'tour' of the Deptford area. This was partly visiting galleries, and partly asking people in the streets to name his or her friend's best quality, after which they were awarded a sticker. Mine was blue, in case you were wondering. (You probably were not.) At first, at the very start, the photographer and I met with the organizers of the event at Tank Gallery in Ladywell. It was a small, white room, with a white table in the centre, a single brown chair, a TV on a small white file cabinet. A number of books were atop the table, one of those being "A Cure For Solitude", which would be helpful in such a room. It screams isolation. The photo of a cone on the wall emphasizes this, because it's a single cone, with no cone friends, and it's lying down. The other photo was that of a tree.

After one of the organizers shows off her raccoon/ red panda costume, I head back to the photographer's van and we zoom off to Deptford via small, twisting side roads, causing me slight motion sickness. Our meeting point is by Deptford rail station, in front of the Train Cafe. A couple of friends join us, causing me great happiness and an uncharacteristic display of affection, unlike my usually reserved self. The photographer recieves a yellow star for his "bizarre sense of humour".

We head to Bearspace, a lovely little gallery displaying interesting art, consisting of metal sheets on brightly coloured backgrounds. A group is filming there, so I may or may not be in someone's documentary/ art film thing. We make a stop at a nearby cafe, and whilst the organizers interview customers about qualities, my two friends and I enjoy a drink, kindly provided by Sunglasses Man. I have a latte, as per usual. The cafe itself is pretty cool, nice interior, and, even more interesting, they have a book exchange system. You can take any book you find interesting, as long as you replace it on your next visit with a book of yours. That is how I acquired The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes. (How is that NOT synchronicity!?) Then again, I may be slightly too obsessed about that. ;)

Next step: Core Gallery. Plenty of Refreshments, including wine, which I could have had, but don't care much for the taste. Ah, I may be an adult but I sure don't have the tastes of one! This gallery has some interesting pieces, such as a bowl of pretzels I munch on throughout the visit. But seriously, some lovely artwork, and a funny demonstration of Sunglasses Man doing his art lecturer type act. ;)

My friends run off, leaving me to wonder if we are ever going to get a move on and visit other galleries. I vent out some frustration by eating pretzels and asking the photographer What are we doing now??? as if he would know. I text Sunglasses Man, something to the effect of How did he dare leave? Just kidding. I simply ask him if they ran off, then phone George, who answers her phone with an evil laugh, rather than the customary Hello? I give her a reproachful How could you leave without me, how could you? The guilt trip doesn't work, as she just laughs, and tells me to meet her and Sunglasses Man at APT Gallery. My first thought is that it stands for A Pile of Trash. That is of course, my opinion, but when the prize winner artwork consists of a jumble of yellow lines, it makes you wonder if the competition was for five-year-olds.

What is this??? Time Machine

Sunglasses Man and George leave, much to my dismay. Art is more fun with friends. The rest of us (we acquired a few more people I forgot to mention, partly because I don't know them and partly because they weren't quite interesting enough) head to Hatch Gallery. Intriguing. It seems the game is to find the hidden artwork amongst the bizarre displays. Good if you like a challenge. Explores the complexity of human minds. Or it just sucks, you decide. If you have imagination, you could write a good essay about those, just make it up. The pièce de résistance features a blue egg stealing another egg's yolk. Not appropriate for vegans.

We make our way through Deptford Market, and I spot a lovely cloud in the shape of a feather. It is golden hour and the buildings are illuminated. The group has separated, it is back to the four of us. The two organizers decide to get Vietnamese food whilst the photographer and I head to our next destination...

Our final stop: The Old Police Station, right next to the new one. Come here to bust your ears and listen to noise. The cells, however, are pretty cool and display photographs which look digitally altered, but they are not, according to the artist. Exciting stuff when you know you won't spend the night inside. Whilst the others are still eating in Deptford Market, the photographer and I go and buy burgers. I haven't eaten all day (practically) and am famished. We then faff around in the police cells (well, I do, mostly. Just me, actually) and politely inform the organizers that it's late and are they gonna finish up already? A few more photos are snapped, and we announce our departure. Before anyone can waste more time, the photographer and I make a run for it in his getaway van. Two seconds later one of the organizers calls, but that just makes us feel even more like getaways. An interesting night indeed.


  1. Very cool! I wouldn't have a single blinking interesting thing to say about modern art, I'm pretty sure, so I like reading interesting and thoughtful reviews of it!

  2. Especially when they incorporate a Sherlock Holmes element... ;)

  3. Yes... as I said to dad, however lame this may become, I have my Sherlock book.... :p

  4. interesting evening indeed, around people I am not used to even try to understand... Art is a funny business, I now grasp the fact that the funny part is before and foremost the availability of intoxicating liquor in the art galleries. You certainly get your mind wide open to any form of art abuse after two or three glass of Chardonnay... the poor artists don't even get a chance to taste real French grape beverage!

  5. What a great post. Your writing is so subtly descriptive that I felt like I was there...without much effort! :-) Love the photos too. Vive Deptford!

  6. Thanks!! I'm so glad. For a short time in my life, I wanted to be a journalist ;)
    (I was "editor" and "reporter" and a bunch of other titles too, for a magazine I created with a friend.)